10 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned in 2023

2023 is closing, and a new year awaits us – how exciting and refreshing to hold onto the hope that 12:00 am on January 1st, 2024, will bring. As much as I can acknowledge the hope and expectation of a new year, I realize that it's not the calendar change that marks a person's transformation. Evolving is a decision all of us must make – whatever your evolution entails, whether it starts with going to the gym, being consistent in reading your Bible, or expanding your friendship circle – evolving into the best version of you requires commitment first. 

Today, I'd like to share 10 life-changing lessons I learned in 2023 that can empower, encourage, and transform you! These lessons entail my personal triumphs and trials, paired with the wisdom life experiences provide. So, let's begin –

1. It's okay to cry.

This shouldn't be a surprise, especially considering a few of the Blog posts I've posted about crying out to the Lord. (Read more here - https://www.takaetalks.com/post/i-am-hannah-weeping-before-the-lord & https://www.takaetalks.com/post/she-who-wept-tears) In this year, I've cried. Tears frequently journeyed down my cheeks at the feet of Jesus. I learned that it's okay to cry, but what's most important is who you cry to. I've cried tears of frustration, heartache, confusion, and happiness, many of which before the Lord. We serve a God who gifted us emotions and shows no fear in displaying them himself. He willingly pours out his overflowing affections on us; why must we hold back our own? 

If you struggle to cry before the Lord or be honest about your emotions with Him, I pray this scripture encourages you: "You've kept track of all my wandering and my weeping. You've stored my many tears in your bottle—not one will be lost. For they are all recorded in your book of remembrance." – Psalm 56:8

2. Be careful what you share with others.

I learned this lesson prominently after a major offense I experienced. Now, offenses will always come, even if you are a Christian. Offenses are inevitable – Jesus told us so! (Luke 17:1) Due to the hardships I'd encountered throughout this year, at a specific point, I frequently shared what I was going through. Honestly, everyone knew because I didn't try to hide how pitiful I felt. One day, I was sharing with someone who asked me how I was doing, and I gave them all the details. Afterward, they said something simple, but I ultimately interpreted it as insensitive. I know that person meant well, but their words still hurt me. Truthfully, after that point, I'd completely shut down from sharing for the most part. Instead, I found myself masquerading my genuine emotions as much as I could because it isn't like anyone cared anyways… (yes, I am completely dramatic, especially during hard seasons; God's still working on me, lol) I can't say that my drama and masquerading changed my situation. Still, I have learned so much since that point. Mostly being, SHUT UP! Now, I do believe in sharing, and I also think there's a necessity to open up, especially if you're facing an unbearably hard time and your mental health is all out of wack – and to my defense, this was, in fact, me – but I noticed, the less I complained and shared about my circumstances, the less prominent they became. I was less focused on what I didn't have and more aware of what God had already given me. The negativity of my situation was minimized while God's goodness was magnified. 

Often, we run to people for the counsel, consolation, and guidance that only God can provide. Instead of complaining to every person who gives you a listening ear, speak to the Lord. Talk to Him about your issues until you can't talk anymore or until the situation changes. I can't guarantee that your situation will change when you begin to do this, but I believe you will. Because even if all you do in prayer is complain, if you complain to the Lord long enough, He will start working on you, molding and reshaping your mindset. Even if your circumstances don't change, you will. 

3. God awaits your obedience! When you move, so can He. 

Now, this lesson is definitely about starting this blog. I spent the first half of 2023 wanting to start the Takae Talks Blog. The idea brewed in my heart. I went back and forth with what ifs and God, how can I, etc. I waited and waited and finally heard, "Just Start!" We often want to do something after the grand photoshoot and set up the thousand-dollar website, especially in our generation. We want all the bells and whistles to accomplish the dream God strategically placed in our hearts. Well, let me tell you – God awaits your obedience. He's waiting for you to move so He can do what He desires in your life. Takae Talks hasn't yet become a grand movement that inspires millions worldwide, but it will. I truly believe this is my small beginning. I'm using the small corner of the internet God has given me to bring Glory to Him and lead others as I follow Him. Never despise the small beginnings. (Zech. 4:10) Just move! Already, I've seen God do some amazing things with me because I decided to do it scared and just start!

4. Remain planted.

When I say remain planted, I mean remain in a Church Home. Remaining planted means attending regularly, serving well, and making it your life's mission to carry out your Church's vision. Online services are prevalent in our current digital society. Still, nothing beats the community bred in a local Church home. My Church has kept me grounded when life could've blown me away. Many of the revelations, guidance, and strength I gained in 2023 directly resulted from attending Church. Much of what I talk about on my blog correlates with what I've received in a Sunday sermon, Bible study meeting, or prayer night. There isn't a week that my Church hasn't brought me fulfillment, encouragement, and community. I love being in a place I can unapologetically grow in the Lord with others. If you aren't attending Church regularly and actively serving in a ministry, I suggest you make it a goal in 2024! If you are in the NJ/NYC area and looking for a fantastic church home, I'd recommend All Nations Church NJ in Elizabeth, New Jersey. I love my Church!

5. Be open to new relationships. 

This year, I challenged myself to form and strengthen new friendships. For many years, this remained a great struggle of mine for various reasons. But in 2023, I've honestly been blessed by the new community I've begun to foster. Truly, this takes intentionality and prayer. I continue to pray to God about the people I should allow into my life, and He guides me every step of the way. I'd also add that sometimes reconciliation is necessary. In fact, you can reconcile with someone despite previous differences. The sooner the reconciliation is, the better, but from experience, I've found that it may not be too late, even if years have passed. Reconciliation may not mean things go back to the way they were. But, it can mean that God restores the relationship to a beautiful place. 

Choose the friendships and relationships you have in your life carefully, and remain prayerful about every new person you invite into your circle. Don't prevent new blessings because of old wounds. Once again, it's inevitable that we will face trials, offenses, and various pains in this life. But so much goodness comes from new relationships, too! 

6. Rejection is redirection. 

Unfortunately, I've faced a lot of rejection this year. This can be painful and heartwrenching. But I want to affirm you in this – no matter who rejects you, God approves of you. He called you and ordained you for such a time as this. Even if the job, the school, or the people view you as unqualified, God has already approved you! Don't be moved by rejection – it's just God's way of redirection!

"Open up before GOD, keep nothing back; he'll do whatever needs to be done: He'll validate your life in the clear light of day and stamp you with approval at high noon." – Psalm 36:5-6

7. Find Hobbies that you enjoy.

Everyone needs hobbies! Seriously, it's so important! We can get so busy that we forget to love life organically. One of the greatest things you can do to love your life is to get some hobbies. I'll list a few – I enjoy working out, cooking, reading books (fiction and non-fiction), coloring, and watching movies. I took myself on a date to the movie theater a few times this year. This date would often entail getting my nails done and eating at a local breakfast spot I enjoy. It's important to prioritize doing things that you love. 

I've already made it a priority next year to try some new workout classes to spice things up! Of course, there are many other things I'd like to try, like singing lessons, playing piano, and professional cooking classes. Still, the hobbies I have now are a great start. Listen, don't be boring! I know life can be challenging, and some hobbies are more pricey, but just start with one! Little by little, you'll get into the groove of something great. 

Hobbies are also a great way to build new and existing relationships. I've gone to the gym a few times this year with a dear friend of mine, which I really enjoyed. As mentioned in a previous blog, I tried pottery with another friend, and that was something both of us tried for the first time! Inviting friends to try something new with you or something you already enjoy will enhance your relationship and, over time, your quality of life, too! 

8. Pray. I mean, really pray. Like, make prayer a PRIORITY!

This lesson seems like a given, especially as Christians. However, I noticed that my prayer life increased substantially as the year progressed. I can equate a big reason this happened to my Church. Another primary reason I've grown significantly in prayer is because I decided to. I believe God honors our seeking. If you genuinely desire the Lord, He will continue to nudge and push you. Many Christians have become numb to the promptings of the Holy Spirit because every time He faintly whispers, we scroll some more on TikTok or Instagram. I get it – I, too, love the entertainment that social media provides. But our generation especially has a significant issue because social media has become the loudest voice in our ears and the blaring message before our eyes. Your mind has become so filled with nonsense that you can no longer sense, hear, and feel when the Holy Spirit speaks. Listen to me: Make it a PRIORITY in 2024 to PRAY! If you pray, you'll read your Bible. If you pray, you'll embark on personal fasts. If you pray, you'll attend and serve at Church consistently. The power of your prayer life will take over, and you'll soar to higher heights spiritually. Put down your phone and pick up your prayer mantle! It's time to PRAY!

9. Celebrate every victory, whether big or small!

As I continue to say, life can be challenging. Not every day is a joyous occasion, but every day is worth celebrating. The Bible says the Lord's grace and mercies are new every morning. 

"The LORD has done it this very day; let us rejoice today and be glad." – Psalm 118:24 NIV

The Message translation of this same verse says, "This is the very day God acted - let's celebrate and be festive!" 

Every day you wake up, God moves and acts on your behalf. Therefore, every day is a day to celebrate. This lesson requires a mindset shift. I began to understand it fully after I graduated. Because of how I felt about my post-graduation plans, at one point, I was tempted not to celebrate graduating college. Boy, what a mistake that could've been! Instead, I celebrated it, and I'm so glad I did. But many months following, my most incredible celebration of the day was getting out of bed and making it to the gym. My season had become unbearably hard, but I still got up. Perhaps nothing grand is happening, but you're still alive! You are in good health, even if it isn't perfect; at the very least, you're healthy enough to read this blog! Every day is worth celebrating. Don't allow what you don't have for tomorrow to steal the joy God imparted today. Joy is available today; enjoy it and find a reason to celebrate!

10. Don't be easily influenced. 

Besides the lesson of prioritizing prayer, this is the most important one I'd like everyone to grasp. Please do not be easily influenced! The temptation that satan taunts many of us with is what everyone else is doing, and this 'everyone else' may or may not be on social media. Perhaps everyone is in your friend group, Church community, school, or workplace. Being easily influenced often starts with comparisons like, "Everyone is getting married, or in a relationship, everyone is starting a family, everyone is buying this trendy thing, everyone is traveling here or there, everyone is getting amazing career jobs, everyone is securing their degrees…" Comparison takes on the tone of "everyone is doing so much better than me." But the Comparison is only part of the story. 

Now, I want to be frank with you. This is something that I've genuinely believed in, primarily as I've accomplished some major things throughout my life: If you want what someone else has, you have to work like or more than someone else worked. Because everything that everyone else has is a direct byproduct of the effort, time, and work they put into that particular thing to yield results. You have the same ability to put in the work to gain the results you desire. 

On the flip side of this, though, what if everything everyone else has isn't what God wants you to have? And this plays a huge role, especially on social media. If you are a Christian, I know many of those you can be influenced by aren't. How God will process you to receive the same kind of blessing is entirely different. What blesses one person may bury another. Refrain from being easily influenced, and keep your eyes on your assignment. 

Often, to a significant degree, how influenced you are by others directly correlates to how spiritually mature and strong you are at the moment. Suppose you're walking in obedience and working on the assignment God has given you – in that case, you can rest assured that although you don't have what they have right now, it's only a matter of time. You're not delayed; you're being processed. Remain faithful to the timing of God and influence others by your steadfastness in Him. 

I'm convinced that taking these 10 life-changing lessons with you into the new year will only better you and keep you grounded in the Lord. 2024 is a year that we must remain steadfast. I know we are going into the new year with many goals and enthusiasm. The keys to accomplishing the great things we have planned are intentionality and consistency! 2024 won't be easy, but it will be successful because we have God on our side!

Lastly, I'd like to pray with you – Dear Lord, I pray that you honor the heart's cry of everyone reading these words you inspired me to write. I believe you are the God who sees us, El Roi, and hears our prayers. Father, as we enter this new year, do something spectacular, life-transforming, and beautiful in us. Allow us to experience your glory and supernatural presence. As we reflect on the lessons we learned this past year, help us to utilize the wisdom we've obtained. Allow us to make decisions that please you and become conduits of your glory. Lord, may we never be too familiar with your presence and miss out on the overflow you've predestined us to experience. In 2024, give us the grace to become, expand and evolve. May our testimony be, on December 31st, 2024, that we've seen the Lord's goodness and experienced His marvelous light. Holy Spirit, be our guide and great helper. You are our reward! In Jesus' Name, I pray. Amen!