Seven Things I Wish I Knew Before Graduating College

In a little less than a week, I will have graduated college a YEAR AGO! A whole year? That’s so insane to me. It felt like time was moving fast and in slow motion at the same time. With my graduation anniversary quickly approaching, I thought it fitting to share with all of you Seven Things I Wish I Knew Before Graduating College! First and foremost, let me be a little clear about my college experience… Initially, I did not want to go to the college I went to, it was the absolute LAST CHOICE on my list. But somehow, God saw it fit that I attend Rutgers University in my hometown, Newark, NJ. When I tell y’all I was trying to get as far away from home as I could, I MEAN THAT! 

About 2 weeks before college began, I started going to my church, All Nations Church NJ. The day before freshman year kicked off, I got baptized! I truly think that was the intentionality of God. Unfortunately, COVID-19 hit in the Spring semester of my freshman year forcing me back home and college wasn’t very typical for me, as many of you may relate. Although, a lot of good things came out of this not-so-good scenario. I served at my church immensely throughout college, in addition to completing five high-level corporate internships and serving as a Resident Assistant for three semesters. It’s safe to say I was quite a busy student. 

I remember the schedule for some of my busiest days where I’d have to get up at 6 AM, have a very quick devotional, get ready for my 8:30 AM science class, (sigh what a drag) finish my science class around 11:30 AM, head to my school’s Starbucks and complete some assignments before my next class in about an hour. After that class, I’d do my internship for about 4-5 hours, then rush to grab dinner and be on shift for RA duty from 7-11 PM. CRAZY! That was such a packed and high-capacity schedule. I honestly felt overwhelmed and exhausted the majority of college because of everything I was doing. However, my hard work and efforts did pay off in the end when I crossed the stage on May 16, 2023, as Magna Cum Laude with my Bachelor of Arts in Journalism and Media Studies! 

Wow… now hear me out. I went from being high-capacity, working tirelessly every day, from school, internship, and resident assistant – to nothing…

Okay, let’s talk about it. 

By God’s grace, I was able to extend my last internship from college until early June. I started applying to jobs in March of 2023 because I thought that I’d start working the summer of 2023 and wouldn’t do any more internships – God said LOL babes. I graduated with NOTHING! No internship, no job, nothing at all! I felt discouraged because so many people were asking me what was next and I had absolutely no idea. Sadly, I’d applied to two Masters in Film programs in NYC and got denied by both. Grappling with the concept that I wouldn’t be a filmmaker anymore, or at least the way I thought sort of defeated me if I’m being honest. No Masters. No Job. What was I, Morgan Takae, the girl who’s so high-performing, outstanding in every educational and career regard going to do? Well, I picked up my very first retail job and HATED IT! I’d never worked in the jobs that are typical in your youth like retail, food, etc. because I started interning in high school. Y’all I was literally so BORED! I often felt like my days were dragging – since then, my perspective of work has changed significantly, especially with understanding EVERYTHING you do is unto the Lord. In my retail job, I grew frustrated and unsatisfied as I grappled with the question, God who am I? Aren’t I made for more? Why are you putting me through this? After the summer, I quit retail. We'll get more into where and how I am now in a later blog.

In retrospect, I can see that God was stripping me of shallow form of identity so that He could remake and mold me into the Woman He called me to be versus the Woman I wanted the world to applaud and see. This was not at all an easy season I’d say it’s taken me the majority of this past year to reconcile with God’s goodness during this reformation season!

Post-college graduation life has been nothing short of a rough transition. However, I do believe if I had the information I'm sharing with you today, back then, I would have been better off. So let's dive into the Seven Things I Wish I Knew Before Graduating College:

1. Every Exit is an Entry. When you exit college, it’s official – YOU’VE ENTERED ADULTHOOD

Now hear me, it’s possible to have already entered the more regular “adulthood” realm based on your upbringing and experiences. But for the typical 21, 22, or 23-year-old, graduating college – You have been shielded in a lot of ways from the “real” world or adulthood because of your educational pursuits. 

It’s easy to focus so much on the season that you’re leaving that you fail to realize the season you are entering. It’s not just an exit, it’s an ENTRY! The reality of adulting begins to set in and you start to realize a few things like – I have to get a job. I need insurance benefits. Student loan payments are due soon. I have to live at home with my parents or I have to move out and find a place to stay. I need to get around like I need a car. Oh snap, I have to pay for groceries. How do I maintain my relationships? What are the foundations of my friendships? Are they built on mere proximity? Who am I outside of the work that I do? Am I doing enough?

All of these questions, anxious thoughts, and ideas come down to three questions: Who am I? What am I doing? Where am I going? I want you to know that these questions looming around in your mind, and perhaps manifesting through anxiety, are NORMAL, and can be expected. You’re entering a brand new season of life that you have no experience in, it’s okay to feel scared, unsure, and have questions. This all leads me to my next point…

2. It’s Okay to Not Know What’s Next

Some of the most frustrating questions that came with graduating college for me were the “What are you doing now? What’s next? Are you going back to school?” Etc. These questions frustrated me because I simply didn’t know, and not knowing was so touchy for me because my whole life, or at least my college career, I thought I knew! Up until a few months before, I thought I’d be going to a 3-year Film Masters program to become a Director. After that rejection, I for sure thought I’d be immediately hired by a company, I mean I do have a great resume right?

“There is a path before each person that seems right, but it ends in death.” – Proverbs 14:12 NLT

If I’m being honest with you, it’s very possible that right now there’s a way for you that seems so good, ideal, perfect even, but that way is NOT the way God has for you. Perhaps you’re thinking that you’re going to enter a particular educational program or pursue a specific career path. It’s possible this isn’t the way God wants you to go, which is fine.

If you’re unsure of what’s next, BE STILL. “Be still, and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.” – Psalm 46:10 NLT

The place of uncertainty may be exactly where God wants you to be because it’s where you can lean and trust in Him most. As the questions come, and people ask you what’s next, simply answer – I’m trusting God. 

3. Rejection is Redirection

This is probably one of the hardest things I’ve had to come to terms with over the past year. Rejection is HARD! It’s never easy to face. It can make you feel unmotivated, discouraged, and defeated. But I know now that Rejection can be God’s form of Redirection. 

Recently, I was telling a friend how rejection has felt as I’ve navigated applying to jobs in this past season. It can feel like you’re walking down a hallway with hundreds of doors. Some of them you knock on and get an immediate no. Others you knock and you have to wait to get a response, sometimes not getting one at all. But someday coming soon, you’ll knock on the right door – the door God has ordained for you, and it’ll open. You’ll be greeted at the door with the words, “Welcome! We’re so happy and honored that you’re here.” So keep knocking! Your opportunity is on the other side of a door you’ve yet to knock on. Don’t get discouraged now!

Rejection is a way of God redirecting you to a different door, and although it isn’t an aspect we enjoy, it can be necessary for us to reach the destination He has for us. 

Never allow a no to stop you from reaching your yes. God has something so beautiful for you – particularly in the realm of opportunities, don’t stop applying to jobs, degree programs, and what have you, because of a no you received. The very fact that you’re still here means God gave you HIS YES, so why doubt your worth and abilities because of a no?

4. Celebrate Yourself Every Step of the Way

Knowing that rejection is a typical aspect of everyone’s journey, it’s important to begin celebrating yourself every step of your journey. Even if you make a small step in the right direction, celebrate it!

Initially, last year, I didn't want to plan a graduation celebration because not knowing my next was so discouraging! I’m so glad that the Holy Spirit helped me in that season to remember that life is so much bigger than how I felt at that moment. Y’all graduating college is a BIG DEAL! You better CELEBRATE!!! I had a beautiful, dreamy graduation picnic that I still smile about to this day. It was a day that I enjoyed and will forever remember!

But can I be honest? That was a celebration high. On a normal day, your celebrations may look different like celebrating when you reach a financial goal, or remain consistent in the gym, or become intentional and persistent in your walk with God. Celebrate those every day wins! Whether it be grabbing some ice cream, relaxing and watching a movie, or maybe even spending a night enjoying good conversation with your friends. Find a way to celebrate every day wins because it encourages you on this journey of life. 

5. Relearn How to Utilize Your Time and Energy

God has given us two great commodities – Time and Energy. However, it’s our responsibility to steward both our time and energy well to be successful in life. In college, your schedule was predetermined by your classes. Perhaps you had an on-campus job, internship, or regular job that required excess time and energy from you. It was easy to find yourself hanging with friends while doing homework together, or studying to guarantee a good grade on your exams. All in all, your life and schedule were set. Life is a lot different when you’re not being held to a particular schedule. It can get a little wonky to be honest… I know, maybe you’ll get a job, but even with a job, you have free time after work. 

As a Christian, something that the enemy can often use against us is our free time. A lot of people have gotten entangled in bad relationships, habits, and addictions because they have TOO MUCH free time on their hands. My suggestion for you in navigating post-grad life is to utilize your free time and energy well.

Here are a few ways you can maximize your time and energy:

• Serve at your local Church (join a ministry or volunteer group)

• Start a hobby (or a few)

• Pick up a side gig or a side hustle (why not generate income with your free time?)

You can maximize your time and energy by creating an environment of learning and growth. You can decide to watch informational YouTube videos or shows that help you hone in on your gifts and talents, or strengthen your points of weakness. With your free time, you can begin to learn about finances, home ownership, entrepreneurship, and having a legacy. Utilize your time by learning how to maximize your Youth and BUILD LEGACY! One thing I’ve heard Bishop T.D. Jakes say time and time again that always sticks with me “You won’t be young forever.” This statement hits me to the core every time I hear it. Listen – You won’t be young forever. You won’t have the time and energy you have now forever. Learn to maximize the time and energy God has gifted you with in this season by being a good steward and accumulating knowledge that can change generations coming after you. 

6. Intentionally Grow and Cherish Your Relationships

Something that shocked me after College is that my relationships got so much better. It seems like the moment I graduated, my friendships improved. Now, I do believe this has a lot to do with the intentionality I put in when it came to my relationships. Something I decided to do is SCHEDULE TIME TO HANG OUT WITH MY FRIENDS! Listen, you need a schedule. You need your outings to be on the calendar. We are all grown, everyone has things to do, places to be, and responsibilities to attend to. Schedule your outings! Schedule your dates.

Although I may not be able to hang out with my friends all the time, I enjoy the time I can hang out with them. Sometimes, I have days where I’m able to hang out with friends spontaneously. But these moments of spontaneity are few and far between. To maintain effective relationships, you have to be intentional with them! Reach out to your friends via texts and phone calls, engage with them on socials, and do all you can to remain connected. 

I know a lot of people graduate college and their friendship circle immediately shifts because a lot of their friends are connected to their college experience. For me, this wasn’t the case since the majority of my social circle revolves around my church community and not my college, but if this is the case for you, it may be time to welcome new friendships and relationships. This can be especially true if you went to college out of state, or perhaps your friends did, and the moment you graduated, all of you were forced to go your separate ways. Long distance friendships work and are effective, but also keep in mind that you need connections and friendships that are in person, a part of your everyday life and happenings!

7. Cling to God

If you don’t do this last point, none of the others will be effective. My friend, CLING to God! Cling means to remain attached or to hold tight. Hold on so tight to God. If there’s one thing I know about this last year of my life after graduation, it is that it’s been a major TRANSITION! Some days are better than others. But the only thing that has kept me is holding onto the Lord. You must know that He is IMMANUEL – God with us. Whatever your journey ahead looks like post-college, God knows and He is with you! You don’t have to be afraid, nor do you have to be anxious. God will carry you through this season and keep you every step of the way. He will never leave nor forsake you. Hold on to God. Cling to God, because He’s the only one who’s true, never-changing, and always present. 

I’d like to pray for you –

Dear Father, I pray for every individual reading this who is soon to be or currently in the transition from college into everyday life and adulthood. I pray that you would give them the grace. Father, endow them with grace for this transition. Help them Lord to even remain graceful with themselves, not looking to their peers as the standard for their life’s journey. Lord, for the one that feels lost, may you be their guide. For the one who feels frustrated and angry because of their situation, may you remind them of your goodness. For the one who feels discouraged and depressed, may you fill their mouths with a joyful song and help them to laugh again. Father meet the needs of your people – the needs they may not know how to communicate or be aware that it’s actually what they are lacking. Lord, I pray that you would help their hearts and their minds. God, may they know that you are God! May they know that you are the Ruler of the Heavens and the Earth, the God who sees all and knows all. God help them to know that you are the God who loves them and protects them from evil and wrong paths. Lord, I pray that you’d be a comforter, and strengthener, and whisper to their hearts the affirmation they need on this very day. El Roi, the God who sees us, SEE US! See our pain, confusion, frustration, discouragement, and even expectation, and have mercy on us. Father, we appreciate you for all you do and all you are. Thank you for being too faithful to fail, in Jesus’ Mighty Name, AMEN!

There’s a few scriptures I’d like for you to hold onto:

“This is why the Scriptures say: Things never discovered or heard of before, things beyond our ability to imagine — these are the many things God has in store for all His lovers.” – 1 Corinthians 2:9 TPT

“Trust in the Lord completely, and do not rely on your own opinions. With all your heart rely on him to guide you, and he will lead you in every decision you make.” – Proverbs 3:5-6 TPT

“There’s a way of life that looks harmless enough; look again—it leads straight to hell. Sure, those people appear to be having a good time, but all that laughter will end in heartbreak.” – Proverbs 14:12 MSG